It’s a Learning Curve

This is the lies people tell you when you’re 28 and come out the other side (a decade Ffs) of failed and bailed relationships. It’s not constructive post-disaster, but it’s a cliché to make you feel better. People really make you believe that time alone can help you gain crucial life skills, and self guidance to successfully lead you astray from the next man-trap and into a fulfilling relationship instead. Time is just time, not always spent productively. All I have gained as time goes on is rage. That, and the ability to efficiently source daily “fuck you”, “strong woman” type memes and fad diet plans – I’d mostly refrain from advertising.

I had become an expert at wasting time with the mundane man. I reckon I am still currently doing so, despite my avoidance, but I justify this to my friends (and mostly myself) by reducing the dosage – hence ‘dating’. It’s OK to talk to boring, crazy or arrogant fuckers, if you don’t commit. They’re not with you.

Those are the stories I’ll tell, not the everyday yawn of playing housewife when I fantasized about dancing on top of bars in Cancun. Of course I would tell my boyfriend at the time that I had no desire to be like those girls and no doubt he’d agree. Lies.